A Calendar of Character

Typically, parents begin the year with resolutions and plans for improving themselves and their families. For several years, contributing to this column, I’ve had the opportunity to address important, but unrelated topics. Starting with this issue, I’ve asked to devote this year’s columns to building children’s character. Each month I’ll focus on a particular character trait and how parents can support their children’s development in that area. Of course, building character is never as simple as naming January “Honesty Month.” Building children’s character is an ongoing process. 

Building Blocks There are many ways to help children develop character. Consider these principles from www.goodcharacter.com:    • Character is defined by your actions, not what you say or believe.    • Every choice you make defines the kind of person you’re choosing to be.    • Doing the right thing isn’t doing the easy thing. Do it even when it’s costly or risky.    • Character means being your own person. Don’t use the behavior of others as a standard for yourself.    • Everything you do matters. Every person makes a difference.    • Good character pays. It makes you a better person, and it makes the world a better place.

Often character is defined in terms of a list of desirable traits. Individuals who possess these traits — fairness, respect, responsibility,
etc. — are said to have character. Character is more than a group of traits, however. It can be said to be the ability to both know right from wrong and to choose wisely to do the right thing.

Character, then, is a combination of both knowledge and action. Parents can impart knowledge to their children about what’s right and wrong directly. Telling children “it isn’t right to hurt others” or “we have to help those less fortunate” are examples. It’s more powerful, however, when parents live the lesson, showing children through their own behavior the moral way.

In the months that follow, I hope you’ll join me in exploring how to develop children of character; building their knowledge and supporting their behavior.  Here’s to a year of growth and to children whose honesty, caring, loyalty, hope and other elements of character makes us swell with pride.

These sites offer information, resources and opportunities for parents to sign up to receive newsletters:
www.casel.org
www.charactercounts.com
www.goodcharacter.com


Rona Milch Novick, Ph.D., is associate professor at Yeshiva University in Manhattan.